Thursday, December 16, 2010

Thor tackles his toughest adversary: the CoCC!

After this summer's dearth of superhero movies, next summer is going to be a maelstrom. The first snowball of this avalanche of awesome is going to be Thor. It stars Chris Hemsworth, the guy who was Jim Kirk's dad at the beginning of J.J. Abram's Star Trek, and Natalie Portman, the actress currently leading the race for Best Actress for Black Swan. Not to mention it's directed by Kenneth Branagh, the guy who has basically made a career out of making popular Shakespeare movies. Shakespeare. Movies. How could this movie possibly suck, I ask you?

Well. According to the Council of Conservative Citizens it will not only suck, but be so socially damaging it warrants boycotting. Here's why: The Norse god Heimdall is played by Idris Elba. He's been in movies like Rocknrolla -- that Guy Ritchie movie that was almost as good as Snatch -- American Gangster, 28 Weeks Later ... just look him up on IMDb. The guy has an impressive resume. And he's black. The CoCC had this to say: "It seems that Marvel Studios believes that white people should have nothing that is unique to themselves." Yeah. Who ever heard of a white superhero? Or better yet, a white superhero in his own movie? Or better yet, that same movie breaking box office records?

Here's a serious question: Do these guys know how stupid they sound? They're concerned about the white guy getting his fair share? Really?

Dear CoCC: Shut up. You're making fools out of yourselves and embarrassing your fellow human beings with your stunning stupidity.

To anyone who feels slight pangs of sympathy (after all, it is Norse mythology, and Heimdall isn't black): Basically, get over it. This is a stupid argument. I could point out that it's rooted in racism -- which is stupid in itself -- and it's inherently flawed -- Marvel's track record shows the opposite, obviously -- and the only people upset by Elba portraying Heimdall will be them -- I'm fairly certain Heimdall himself won't mind; why should we?

A while ago, they finally starting filming The Hobbit. They were casting and it was exciting. Fanboys like me were looking forward to spending more time in Middle Earth. After a small scandal, the casting guy was fired for being racist. He was only allowing white people to audition for the roles of hobbits, and people complained. His defense was he was looking for people who looked like hobbits, which are short and white. That's what's been established in the previous movies.

Compare these two instances: A black man is cast, and people call it racist. An all-white audition is called for, and people call it racist. Which one is right? The second one of course. In modern society, white males have the most power. It's unfortunate, but true. That makes it okay, even really good, for Heimdall to be black. Conversely, it makes forcing all hobbits to be white bad.

Whether the CoCC will boycott it or not, Thor has a very talented cast and a very good director and will probably not suck. The trailer alone is amazing. Watch it here: Thor Trailer