Inception

Christopher Nolan is my hero. This is important. Reader, you are currently reading a significantly skewed review. Every movie Nolan has made I've loved and adored with two exceptions: Insomnia and Batman Begins, which I thought were only "amazing." My friend noted this about Nolan: he respects his audience. He understands that there are movie goers who enjoy a compelling story told intelligently. What a refreshing concept. His movies are complex and his plots rich. He is a director who acts as a narrator and directly crafts events, characters, themes, and such to tell the story he wants the audience to experience. Here's where Inception comes in and why the reviews I'm seeing make me so furious.

There may be spoilers ahead. It also may be confusing to anyone who hasn't already watched the movie. If this is you, skip to the last paragraph.

Inception has been faulted for lack of character development outside of the main character, Cobb. I've read that it is light on character and heavy on effects. I've also heard of some reviewers saying meaningless comments to the effect that they wished they had slept through the movie. To all of you, I have this to say: you are idiots. Idiots, fools, morons. No one should care what you think, because you don't have anything worthwhile to say. Please stop making noise. You're embarrassing yourself. Really, just... shame on you. I don't pay attention to rotten tomatoes anymore because it's populated by writers who don't have two brain cells to rub together. I can't believe they're writing for money and I'm not. If I could have one wish, it would be to fly at super speed. If I could have two, it would be that every stupid person would be aware of their stupidity and be ashamed -- not compelled to share their opinion that isn't worth an uphill piss with a worldwide audience that could have a direct impact on a brilliant film.

Like I said, the reviews make me furious. Here's why: they missed the point of the movie.

A motif(look it up) of the movie is the main character uncertain whether or not he's in reality or a dream. Close to the end, he tells his subconscious poltergeist wife, Mol, that she is only a shadow of the real thing: she's a flat characterization of the wonderful woman she really was.

I think I read a reviewer talking smack about the film's editing. If I'm correct, I say this: "You fool!" One of the points Cobb makes to Ariadne is that in a dream, the dreamer often can't remember how they got to their current location. That's one way of telling a dream from reality. Often, I noticed each shot beginning with the characters already in the frame, making the shift from one shot to the next a little jumpy: I wasn't sure how the characters got to their current location. Example: at the end of the movie (spoiler) Cobb goes directly from the airport to his house; not to a car outside that takes them home -- there's not even a shot of them going in the front door. How exactly did he get there?

Wait a minute. The characters in the dreamers' subconscious are flat; the dreamers can't remember how they got to their current location. The characters who aren't Cobb are complex and compelling, but relatively flat; the editing makes the viewer a little unsure of how the characters got to their current location... do you see where I'm going? Nolan is deliberately crafting a movie that directly asks the viewer: is what you're seeing reality, or just Cobb's dream? Example: how can Saito make Cobb's problems go away with a phone call? It's pretty implausible, and not explained, but it would make sense if it was devised by Cobb's desperate subconscious. Is the whole movie just in his dream? You tell me.

To all of you who skipped ahead, here is the last paragraph. Visually, this movie is award-worthy. Easily. Jaw-dropping good, and that's not easy anymore. The story is creative, imaginative, utterly original, layered, and complex. The characters are complex but relatively flat, serving mainly as foils to Cobb. Luckily character development isn't the end-all be-all (YOU IDIOTS!!). In this case, the characters are a vehicle for the film's question: is this whole thing just Cobb's dream? Here's a hint: watch for his wedding ring. Thoroughly brilliant, completely fun, exactly the reason movies are ever made. Highly recommended. The more people to see this movie, the better. Don't listen to the morons out there bashing this movie, listen to me: this movie is fantastic. Totally fun and totally good. They don't get much better than this. Most definitely does not suck. At all. See it.